Welcoem to posts!!
in the future - u will be able to do some more stuff here,,,!! like pat catgirl- i mean um yeah... for now u can only see others's posts :c
DANGER & CAUTION
Please keep an eye out for dive-bombing carrier pigeons as we will be dispatching our first newsletter from the new Squire Army website within the next 24 hours. We're ever so sorry, they're still new to this - you see we got them on discount from the Top Secret testing facility at Bomber Command & haven't quite got them re-trained yet.
Anyway, get yourself signed up to the newsletter if you haven't already, it's bloody free! - www.squire.army/newsletter
And if you can afford to spend a penny (not sure I've used that expression correctly...) then enlist to join the Squire Army to-day - www.squire.army/recruiting-office
That'll be all.
Bill
966 - 22
Go to www.squire.army/ to get stuck in to the action.
The new Squire website has just launched! Thatâs right, that thing we were talking about all the way back in December. Do you remember?
Weâve finally finished constructing and testing our very own website, completely independent of any other platform, like YouTube or Patreon, where you can enlist at different ranks and access a variety of extra content and special perks, from outtake compilations to actually being in a sketch or even complimentary Squire branded tea and mugs, starting today!
We also have a new Discord server totally private to those who sign up to the website where we can chat and make plans for event and museum attendance and where you can give us future video and perk ideas for what youâd like to see on the website going forwards. Maybe youâd like a Squire podcast? Or maybe you think weâre really boring and should give up this whole comedy nonsense? Well, now you can let us know⌠directly⌠by going to the Mission Updates page on the website and clicking the Join button.
Now we understand that a lot of you may already support your favourite content creators on established platforms, like the aforementioned Patreon, and might be wondering why we havenât just done this over there. Well, the answer is pretty simple - we decided to set up on a new platform because, like many other YouTubers, weâre worried about the way things are going on here for people trying to make a living out of it, itâs becoming increasingly more difficult to abide by the ever changing terms and conditions and nobody ever really knows what âThe Algorithmâ is going to do from one day to the next. Honestly we just didnât want to hand ourselves over to another platform to be beholden to. By hosting and building our own website (and we really did build it ourselves, so⌠sorry if thereâs any bugs) we can do absolutely whatever we want with it, weâre not restricted on what kind of perks we can offer, or giveaways we can run, or how gory we want to make our videos.
If youâd like to support us then check out the website and if you have any queries whatsoever before enlisting then just get in touch with us - either leave us a comment here or reach out through the âContact Usâ on the website and one of us will get straight back to you.
To those already supporting us on the old Squire Patreon, we recognise that increasing from the basic $1 a month tier on Patreon to a starting tier of ÂŁ5 might seem like quite an increase and that is why everyone who currently supports us there will be getting a discount to provide them their first month absolutely free of charge, in appreciation for all of your continued support over there. If you havenât received your code already, get in touch via Patreon and weâll sort that for you immediately. This new website will be full of much, much more content with at least one weekly behind the scenes post as well as a selection of benefits that you can access any time upon request, we will also be looking to evolve what the website offers with new perks and new types of content (again, Squire podcast anyone?) as we get more of your feedback telling us what you want. So get over there now and start shaping the future of the Squire website!
Go to www.squire.army/ and enlist to-day!
Thank you everyone for sticking with us.
Olly & Bill
311 - 8
Hello chaps, just letting you all know that we'll be attending Portsmouth Armed Forces Day this Saturday (8th June) at Southsea Common. We'll be there all day from 10am to 4pm and you'll be able to find us hanging around the World of Warships camp for most of the day, so if you're free don't forget to Bis-mark it in your calendars and come say hello or have a game with us! Technically have to call this an #ad but we are jolly looking forward to the day and hope to see a good few of you there.
644 - 40
Itâs time for another update, chaps, so we suggest you get the kettle on.
Weâve just received two big boxes marked âTop Bloody Secretâ, containing white enamel mugs destined to become the first hundred examples of the Squireâs MK.1* Thermal War Armed Teacup - early field-reconnaissance attached (and not to be acronymed under any circumstance!)
If youâve watched our latest video right through, youâll already know some of this, but launching alongside the MK.1* TWAâŚTeacup will be our very own brand of English Breakfast Tea, blended and packaged in Britain - name and packaging still under development. Weâve taken serious and careful consideration in who we work with on our own brand of tea and have decided to partner with the lovely folks over at Tea People; they're a Social Enterprise, meaning that they put at least 50% of their profits toward charitable causes! Indeed they help fund educational and social projects in impoverished tea growing regions as well as provide healthcare and medical supplies to their tea growers where it otherwise wouldnât be available. All of their packaging, from tea bags to tin caddies and refill packs are either 100% recyclable, compostable or biodegradable meaning theyâre awfully eco-friendly to boot. And as if that wasnât enough, on top of all of that, weâve worked together to find a blend that tastes bloody great too! With scope to develop new, more sophisticated, not-for-your-common-soldier, officersâ specialty tea in the future, we hope you thoroughly enjoy it.
As a reminder: anyone who signs up at the Captain ($50) tier or above when the website launches will immediately be entitled to a complimentary Squireâs MK.1 and a tin caddy of 25 teabags!
We leave you today with the second image, an example of one of our scripts that will be posted on the website, all formatted nicely for human consumption and with extra details such as the deleted scene marked here in red - the footage of which will be neatly linked to, along with other behind-the-scenes stuff from each video like de-censored edits where weâve had to remove/edit entire scenes because of blood stains, gunshots and questionable political symbols (which is basically every video) to not be demonetised here.
674 - 24
Well, itâs been a little over a month since we announced the grand plan of a new Squire website and merch store, and weâd like to start this update by thanking those of you whoâve commented or been in touch for your supportive and helpful feedback. Progress is going well, with about fifty percent of the website complete and merchandise production well underway.
Currently our intention is to start taking orders for one or two pieces of merch at the time of the website/memberships launch with dispatch beginning the following week. Initially weâre looking to space out merchandise releases in waves, with limited runs of each product, giving us the chance to tweak and change designs over time; by doing this we feel it will also put less pressure on the two of us to be shovelling packages into the mail like firemen on a steam locomotive and give us more time for individual notes and personalisations in your orders that we otherwise wouldnât have the freedom to make or include - so keep an eye out for little surprises like that in your parcels!
In other website development news, weâve spent the last week over at the Great War Huts near Bury St Edmunds capturing material for the website to ensure that even on the blandest of bland âerror 404â or âcontact usâ pages thereâll still be a little something to entertain. We canât give away too much yet but what we can say is that if every single page on the website doesnât feel like its own little self-contained Squire sketch when weâre ready to launch, well⌠weâll be pretty disappointed, because thatâs what weâre aiming for.
Thatâs about it for today, but weâll be back sooner next time with more updates on exactly what merch weâll be launching with and more details on the website memberships and corresponding benefits. Weâll leave you for now with a couple of quick behind the scenes shots of us hard at work collecting material for the website. Ah, would you look at Olly there, in his vaguely smart un-ironed service dress. Donât worry, weâll fix that in post⌠probably.
Until next time!
Olly & Bill
1.4K - 35
As you chaps are probably all aware it's starting to become quite ruddy difficult for people like us (you know the sort, those who like to run around shouting mildly rude insults at each other while brandishing lethal weapons) to make a sensible living on YouTube, what with all of the regularly changing monetization guidelines and the black art they call "The Algorithm". Now, we've been meaning to revive our ever ailing Patreon for some time and, well... forget we mentioned it, because we've decided to do something much better instead!
We're in the process of designing and building a website that will be a one stop shop for everything Squire outside of YouTube - from our new merchandise, to channel updates & a brand new Patreon-style membership/reward system. And we'd like to hear from you as to what you think of the plan, and what you'd like to see there!
Nothing will change here on YouTube, but everything will be available on our website as well, uncensored and completely advert free to those who enlist, along with extra content every week, like behind the scenes posts, outtakes, and general channel news from the two of us (from $5 per month(or your regional equivalent (*remember to insert something about "cost of a Starbucks coffee" later*))). The new site will give us a single, coherent way to deliver the content we want to make straight to you with nobody in the middle to tell us when it's against the rules or... past our bedtimes! And it will give you all a direct way to purchase merchandise from us, made with our own four hands, or to support the channel directly without any Patreon fees or ludicrous merchandise company markups getting in the way - meaning we can always ensure that everything we offer will be made as affordable as possible.
Speaking of us ensuring things; that really is the message that we can't emphasise enough - what we want to do is run a platform that WE are in charge of, that if you have any problems WE will sort them, you'll never be palmed off to a third party or a customer support team. Everything will be personally made and quality checked by us before we're willing to put our names to it (and we'll be able to make all manner of limited run and bespoke stuff!). Everything we say we'll deliver on the platform, we'll be beholden to, or our reputations for being somewhat regularly on time with things be damned!
Below is our first draft of what we think, based on our YouTube colleagues' own offerings, might be appropriate to ask you to part with for what we hope you'd like us to give you in return. Any and all feedback is welcome: have another reward idea? Then let us know; think something we're offering is naff? Then tell us it's a load of khaki shorts. We're mid way through the design at the moment and will continue to share (hopefully shorter, for all your sakes) updates as we get closer to launching & will continue to take feedback onboard at every step, but our current aim is to be up and running within the next couple of months with the website, memberships and our first merch in over five years all launching simultaneously.
A quick word to our current Patreon supporters: donât worry, weâve not forgotten you! All supporters at the time of the new site going live will be ported over with 1-month completely free of charge at the nearest corresponding rank, to give you time to decide if itâs something you want to continue with before we close the Patreon.
And finally, thank you to each and every one of you reading this, be you new to the channel or old chums, Patreon patrons or stingy buggers, not just because you managed to get through all that guff, but because we appreciate your continued support and that you keep coming back every two weeks, even when we sometimes forget to. We hope to keep entertaining you for years to come!
Olly & Bill
1.3K - 92
Evening chaps! Now, it's only taken us about eight years, but here's some new artwork we're rolling out for the channel! We just wanted to take this little opportunity to thank everybody for continuing to watch and support us. Sometimes I really have to stop and appreciate the fact I've been going on this platform for 10 years now, and I truly can't believe how much it's all evolved. It started with some low-qaulity War Thunder gameplay in 2013, and now my best friend Bill and I get to manufacture low qaulity comedy sketches as our jobs. We're both incredibly thankful to everyone (and there's a lot of you) that've helped us along the way. Going forwards, we've got plenty of outrageously ambitious videos planned for the rest of the year, and hopefully some merchandise soon. Have a lovely rest of your weeks - Olly
2.7K - 103
Hello chaps! We're looking at holding a meet & greet at the Samsung KX Space in King's Cross Station, London on a Saturday toward the end of September/early October. We would be bringing some exciting new, yet to be released, Squire merch, including mugs and posters and be around to chat with you all for a few hours.
Would you mind awfully letting us know in the poll below how likely you would be to come along to something like this? As we need to gauge likely interest before moving forward. More information to come...and a video in a couple of days!
389 - 152
Hello chaps, whilst we work away at our 3 videos for November, we'd like to say a quick thanks to all of your for watching us. The channel is doing nicely, and we've had a few fairly viral videos recently which absolutely blows our minds. We'd also like to take this opportunity to thank our friends over at Paradox once again for kindly sponsoring our last two videos. If you've not had a chance go and check out our Victoria 3 video & pick this link: play.victoria3game.com/Squire
Anyway, have a nice weekend chaps - Video including the real Easy 8 Sherman 'Fury' coming in a few days.
2.1K - 48
Hello chaps, we hope you've had a nice weekend. Want a nice weekend next weekend too? Why not check out Armourfest at the Norfolk Tank Museum. We've recorded a few things there over the years, and they're a great bunch of chaps who run a brilliant display of armour. Anyway, I'd best get back to editing. norfolktankmuseum.co.uk/event/...
1.3K - 36
For business enquiries contact us here: Hello@TheGoldStudios.com
For everything else, including website or newsletter queries: Squire.Contact@Gmail.com
British comedy sketches! At the attempted output rate of 2 per month. Don't laugh, It'll happen eventually. Probably.